Cyber bullying – I’m sure you’ve heard of it.  Kids have committed suicide because of it.  Or, kids being enticed by child pornographers who come across online as wonderful folks who show the child (usually pre-teens and teens) lots of attention – I’m sure you’ve heard news stories about this as well.

The common denominator in most of these dangerous situations, is parents who don’t monitor their children’s online activity – many readily admit to knowing little about the computer at all. Choosing to remain computer illiterate is like having children who are or want to become drivers when you don’t have your own license – there is no way you can provide the required level of adult supervision, guidance, and instruction because you don’t have a clue yourself.  And if you do know computers, not closely monitoring your children’s use of them is the akin to having no idea who your kids’ friends are or where they are and what they’re doing when they’re together.

Online today is the “hanging out at the mall” of our day, only with far more inherent dangers.

So, here are my recommendations for keeping your kids…and grandkids…safe on the internet while helping them learn how to negotiate it as part of their growing up process - starting with the most obvious:

• If you don’t know computers, learn them, now and quickly – there is just no other path toward internet safety than one that requires you to know how to use it, and negotiate the web
• Once you’ve learned the computer, and for those who already use it, don’t be shy about setting up the parental controls that keep your kids off of certain sites – and keep predators from your kids – don’t let “that’s not faaaaairrrr” ever deter you from keeping them safe – just ask if they want a little cheese with that whine….
• Have all computers in a common area so you can keep an eye on kids’ usage – don’t let kid or fellow-adult peer pressure cause you to think that you are being “mean” by not allowing your child to have a computer in their room… that kind of off the radar computer use is precisely where many sad endings, begin
• Consistently talk with your children/grandkids, particularly teens, about cyber bullying – that it can happen to anyone (it can) – that it stems from the insecurities of really troubled kids not your child’s short-comings (it does), and that you have your kid’s back if something like that starts with them (you do!)
• Finally, let children know that you will be monitoring their use of social networking sites like Facebook, not because you don’t trust them, but because it’s another way of keeping them safe, just like the need to know who they’re going out with, where they’re going, and when they’ll be home…
  

You have been officially alerted….

If you need, someone to provide in-home care for an elder loved one, a recent article by LA Times writer Rosemary McClure highlights the dangers of hiring the wrong person.  

In it, she describes her mother, who has dementia, being left in the caretaker’s hot car for hours at a time, which she found out from a friend who saw this and reported it to her.  As it turns out, the caretaker was visiting her boyfriend on caretaker time, leaving mom in the sweltering car during these “conjugal” visits.

Unfortunately, such bad care-taking happens all too frequently, and not because we who did the hiring, don’t care enough to find someone good.  It’s more like given the time and effort it can take to make sure you have the right person on the job, we can easily become unwittingly careless.  As Ms. McClure puts it quite well: … “many well-meaning and caring adult children are just as lackadaisical as I was when hiring help for their parents.”

Here’s the very good news: Finding quality assistance personnel doesn’t have to be difficult – if you know the right way to look.

• First, use an accredited home health service – you will pay more per hour, but you will get a much higher quality person, and many priceless value added benefits like background checks on workers, fill-in help if your worker calls in sick, and a company you can hold legally accountable.  We’ll have on our website two services that I can recommend. To get you started, I can recommend: eldercarelink.com a national service which connects you to the resources in your community; and in Tampa Bay, Harmony Home Healthcare, at harmonyhh.com or you can call 727-723-7532
• Second, treat this as the job interview it is whether or not you’re using a home care service – have a basic job description developed, and insist on at least 2 references for anyone you’re considering. 
• Finally, look closely at the level and quality of training the person possesses or the agency provides their care personnel.  Untrained may be cheaper, but there’s a reason for that…don’t find out what it is at the expense of your loved one.
  

You have been officially alerted….

Each year there are hundreds of drowning deaths for children under the age of 5, and thousands of ER visits for pool submersion, many as a result of inflatable pools.  The reason: when very small children get themselves in there when you’re not looking, the inflatable sides make it impossible for them to get out.  Not a problem, you may be thinking…if they’re scared or in trouble, I’ll hear them.  Not true.

Many people think that if a child falls in the water, you will hear lots of splashing and screaming which will alert you to come to the rescue, when in fact, oftentimes children slip under the water silently. Even people near the pool report hearing nothing out of the ordinary.

Here’s some facts & tips to help you keep such a tragedy from happening at your home:

• Many drowning deaths occur when young children are initially not near the pool area. In a US Consumer Product Safety Commission study, almost 70 percent of young drowning victims were last seen in the house or nearby on a porch or in the yard before the incident.  And drowning can occur in the few minutes it takes to answer the phone. So when you know you’ll be distracted, take the extra precaution of bringing the tots inside & securing exits from the house to the pool area.
• Data from the same study shows that about 77 percent of the victims had been missing for 5 minutes. Precious time is often wasted looking for missing children anywhere but in the pool. Always look for a missing child in the pool first. 
• Put even a small inflatable pool in an area where small children can’t get to it without you present, or put some sort of barrier around it that small children can’t get through.
  

You have been officially alerted….